Sanding our assholes with 150 grit.

"Your boobs are about to get in your food"

...said one coworker to another at dinner last week.

Luckily I didn't have to try to act normal afterwards - I was outed instantly by all of them. :)

Philo
Permalink Send private email Philo 
January 26th, 2006 7:14pm
Mmmmm, milk. The old moloko-plus.
Permalink Send private email Bored Bystander 
January 26th, 2006 7:24pm
Sorry, I don't get the whole try to act normal outed instantly bit. Outed as what? Me confused. Surely the boobs comment rated no more than a slightly raised eyebrow?
Permalink Send private email Ian Boys 
January 26th, 2006 7:31pm
I think what Philo is trying to say is that he had a raging hard-on.
Permalink Send private email muppet 
January 26th, 2006 7:32pm
I inferred that but it made Philo seem like some hormone crazed 14 year old.
Permalink Send private email Ian Boys 
January 26th, 2006 7:34pm
Yes...and?
Permalink Send private email a cynic writes... 
January 26th, 2006 7:40pm
"Surely the boobs comment rated no more than a slightly raised eyebrow?"

Slightly raised eyebrow and of course necessary visual inspection of the alleged near-accident.

I was caught staring. :P

Philo
Permalink Send private email Philo 
January 26th, 2006 7:44pm
Again, Philo?  Not at the gym this time, either.
What a lech!
Permalink Send private email John Haren 
January 26th, 2006 7:45pm
Ah. Philo gets back to cool dude status. Wasn't the whole table looking?
Permalink Send private email Ian Boys 
January 26th, 2006 7:47pm
Not so much an "again" as more of a "still"

Honestly, I'm generally very good about looking women in the eyes. But there are occasions...

Philo
Permalink Send private email Philo 
January 26th, 2006 7:50pm
"Wasn't the whole table looking?"

Since the rest of the table was female...

...I certainly hope so...

Philo
Permalink Send private email Philo 
January 26th, 2006 7:50pm
Ya gotta keep hope alive!
Permalink Send private email John Haren 
January 26th, 2006 7:51pm
Hmmm a case of DCOL* heh.

*Doesn't Count On Location
Permalink Send private email Simon Lucy 
January 26th, 2006 7:56pm
Philo's female coworkers invited him out for lunch?

They're eithe realy dumb, don't know him very well, or really wanted to get it on in a massive orgy.

I'll let your imagination decide which is the correct answer.
Permalink The Notorious T.A.W. 
January 26th, 2006 7:57pm
Well, Philo works for Microsoft, and Joel isn't there to do the hiring anymore.  So I'll go with stupid.
Yep.
Permalink Send private email John Haren 
January 26th, 2006 7:58pm
I apologize, the dumb thing was pretty rude.

Maybe I should have said "they're really smart, but unable to pick up on social cues (i.e. guy stares at your boobs all day), etc."
Permalink The Notorious T.A.W. 
January 26th, 2006 7:58pm
Incidentally, it reminds me that on one of the Doctor Who episodes I just watched there as a young lady with a rather low cut top, little support and some very attractive jiggling during the action sequences, not to mention a gratuitous camera angle or two. Nice to see they didn't go all politically correct and drop the idea of providing a bit of eye candy for the older viewers.
Permalink Send private email Ian Boys 
January 26th, 2006 8:04pm
Actually I have quite a few female friends - the recurring opinion seems to be that I'm okay to have around "because I'm so honest."

Christ, I don't know what planet these women are from - I'm a complete perv and they say things like that? I mean, there's a genetic imperative to abuse the invitation, isn't there?

Anyway, they put up with me, I'll take the free meals.

Philo
Permalink Send private email Philo 
January 26th, 2006 8:25pm
Eyecandy's like chinese food. An hour later and you're hungry again.

But your colleagues just forgot you were you or forgot you were there. Girltalk in the absence of boys is quite unrestrained.
Permalink trollop 
January 26th, 2006 8:51pm
They PAY you (in food) for the abuse?

Hire a 70's band to play some chikka bow wow music in the restaurant next time just to see what happens.
Permalink The Notorious T.A.W. 
January 26th, 2006 8:52pm
trollop you're mad. If they remembered Philo was there they should instead have let the unfortunate woman go ahead and get food all over the front of her clothing? A gentleman would hopefully have issued the same warning if he had been the one to notice. It's hardly different from dipping your tie in your soup.
Permalink Send private email Ian Boys 
January 26th, 2006 8:57pm
I am unabashedly bonkers but my point sprang from Philo's apparent shock at the word "boobs" in mixed company. Saner societies can, and do, print the word in family newspapers eg. "Britney in boobtube" without raising eyebrows.

But print "Tits" and you won't get out the door before the PCpolice pull you up on it.

So here the anecdote wouldn't have been worth posting but if I'd been in the same situation and one of the womenfolk had said "Sherryl, mind your norks" I'd have boggled.

Being caught staring is always a sin. Why, I cannot fathom.
Permalink trollop 
January 26th, 2006 9:11pm
Tits & Boobs are about equal in my book. Though Boobs might win out for having the "Boobies" variant.
Permalink The Notorious T.A.W. 
January 26th, 2006 9:13pm
Shit
Piss
Fuck
Cunt
Cocksucker
Motherfucker
Tits
Permalink bionicroach 
January 26th, 2006 9:14pm
Ah. No, my nonplussitude wasn't about using the word 'boob' - it was about one woman calling specific attention to another's breasts. Mind you, I wholeheartedly approve of the action - in fact I encourage it. But in my experience it's a fairly rare event.

Philo
Permalink Send private email Philo 
January 26th, 2006 9:15pm
"Tits" is almost innocent - sounds like a snack. :)

Philo
Permalink Send private email Philo 
January 26th, 2006 9:15pm
Really? It's not all that rare in my world. Not at a business lunch, mind you, but socially, it's not that big a deal.
Permalink The Notorious T.A.W. 
January 26th, 2006 9:16pm
"New Nabisco Tits. The new Cheese Tits, and Corn Tits and Pizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits, yeah. Betcha can't eat just one. That's true I usually switch off . But I mean that word does not belong on the list."
Permalink bionicroach 
January 26th, 2006 9:19pm
"It's not all that rare in my world."

Dude, remember when I said "if Philo and Mark TAW were roommates"? That may have been foreshadowing...

philo
Permalink Send private email Philo 
January 26th, 2006 9:20pm
i don't remember you guys being this funny at ... the, umm, old place ... Cheese Tits  :)
Permalink Send private email PNII 
January 26th, 2006 9:21pm
Credit goes to George Carlin on that one:

http://www.erenkrantz.com/Humor/SevenDirtyWords.shtml

But yeah, I agree - this place has been on a tear. Everyone's giddy. :)
Permalink bionicroach 
January 26th, 2006 9:26pm
Tits definitely get noticed. Over and over ...

http://www.wildyorkshire.co.uk/naturediary/docs/feb00/feb24.html

Benny Hill used to get all onitholocular over blue tits, couldn't get enough poor lad.
Permalink trollop 
January 26th, 2006 9:40pm
So, Philo, where are the pics?
Permalink Send private email Aaron F Stanton 
January 27th, 2006 9:50am

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