RIP Philo

pretty good job ad

Office Jester
at The Motley Fool
Alexandria, VA 22314

Office Jester

The Motley Fool seeks an outgoing, multi-talented Fool to be our full-time Office Jester. That's right; we work hard and have fun too. We couldn’t be the Motley Fool without our own Jester, after all. The ideal individual will embrace our core value of Joyful Optimism, bringing humor, entertainment, and amusement to all employees and visitors of Fool Global HQ. This is not a new position but it offers great flexibility in execution.
Primary Responsibilities/Objectives:

* Roam office entertaining employees
* Plan and execute parties and happy hours
* Participate in all company meetings and gatherings as an interstitial speaker
* Identify struggling or overworked Fools or Teams and brighten their day
* Function as office DJ, managing/programming the office sound system. Manage musical requests efficiently, while keeping the office bumping.
* Order pizza for Pizza Day
* Repair damaged jester caps
* Construct complex balloon animals
* Care and feeding of the office monkey, Dr. Zaius
* Ride in Foolmobile as body double decoy for Gardner brothers
* Piggyback carry the winner of The Motley Fool Stock Picking Contest in St. Patrick’s Day Parade

Core Competencies:

* Current on all reality TV
* Pop Culture expert, able to postulate about Season 3 of Lost
* Always at the ready with a quip or comeback.
* Equally comfortable in a jester cap and bear suit
* MS Excel
* Proven game room skills as a formidable adversary in Halo, Ms. Pacman and Bubble Hockey; ability to convincingly let management win on occasion.
* Juggle chainsaws, bowling balls, and one item of your choosing
* Have >50 answers to knock-knock jokes, at least half of which must be funny
* Must have authored at least one viral video of moderate fame.
* Can tap a keg on the first try
* Extra napkins and utensils at the ready for Fools eating at their desks
* Can chug beer, shotgun beer, guzzle beer, snort beer, play beer pong, flip cup, 3 man, do beer bongs, beer cheers, keg stands, and bluegills with the best of them

Preferred Qualities:

* Friends would tell you that you are “seriously funny!” but they are laughing so hard they can’t breathe
* Tall or short but we prefer that you not be of average height, as it’s not as funny
* Crazy hair
* Annoying and easily recognizable laugh
* Friends with at least one B list celebrity. (No reality contestants)
* Experience in three of the following: Stand up, Street mime, rally racing, horticulture, pottery, rapping, paragliding, cattle ranching, roller skiing, ballet, actual break dancing/popping, ice fishing, chess
* Blood type AB (or equivalent)
* Ability to type 90 words a minute, replacing all vowels with various forms of smileys


* Clown college, Improv school, School of the Americas, Brown, or equivalent experience

PS Are you a C# developer? Web systems engineer? .NET expert? Seriously.
Permalink in my opinion 
March 30th, 2007 10:21pm
Well, for the Beer part, you just need to get an EE from the 40-Beer club.
Permalink Send private email Ward 
March 30th, 2007 10:34pm
i think fool is like netflix with the "take the vacation you need" rule.
March 30th, 2007 10:35pm
Adds a whole new twist to the saying "a fool and his money are easily parted".
Permalink Send private email strawberry snowflake 
March 30th, 2007 11:20pm
Are they really hiring a jester or is that all just only an ad for a C# developer?
Permalink Practical Economist 
March 30th, 2007 11:43pm
So he's like the dancing guy in The Mighty Mighty Bosstones?
Permalink Send private email Blooregard Q. Kazoo 
March 31st, 2007 1:07am
I knew a guy who used to work there.  He said the office saying was "fool on!"

Which meant something like "shut up and just get it working, fool."