Nobody likes to be called a dummy by a dummy.

Strong enough not to perform (or contemplate) suicide?

An expat hanged himself at his house. He was a kind person, a good boss and well respected. He was an intensely private person, very quiet. The reason of his suicide is still unclear, but there are rumours circling around. A good bet is because of personal relationship combined with health problem.

Just make me wondering whether I'm strong enough not too perform suicide if I am forced to a dire situation, whether due to personal, medical,or financial problem. Never contemplating doing it though. Love my family too much, and my religion forbid it. Just afraid that I'm not strong enough.
Permalink Asian contingent of COTers 
July 9th, 2007 8:32pm
I just can't stop turning pages.
Permalink Send private email Philo 
July 9th, 2007 9:03pm
the good thing about people who successfully commit suicide is you can stop worrying about thm.
Permalink Send private email zestyZucchini 
July 9th, 2007 9:09pm
The ultimate thing that stops me is two-fold.

First, it's the ultimate waste.  You can't give your life back to yourself, it's the only one you've got.  No matter how bad things get, you are you.  You are the only combination of time, parents, space, personality, genetics that will ever be.  You are unique.  Why should you destroy something so unique?

Second, once you do that, there's no getting better.  Isn't there some suspense as to how things MIGHT change for the better tomorrow?  Next week?  Next month?
Permalink SaveTheHubble 
July 9th, 2007 9:13pm
The only people you hurt are the people who love you.  Don't do that to them.

There are counselors, support groups, and medications that may help.  Try those first before giving up, please.
Permalink AMerrickanGirl 
July 9th, 2007 9:18pm
but if you _are_ considering suicide, for christs sake dont tell your loved ones first.  either just get the job done, or shut the fuck up about it.


dont drag the shit out for them.
Permalink Send private email zestyZucchini 
July 9th, 2007 9:26pm
I try not to call people "Idiot" very often.

But when zZ is making sufficiently stupid and insensitive remarks about other people's flirting with death, well, that's one of the times.

You IDIOT!  It would be a horrible act to off yourself without giving your loved one(s) a few chances to help.

Now, I'm sure you think anybody taking suicide advice from a forum called "CrazyOnTap" would be crazy.  Still, we have a legacy of Chris McKinstry.  I don't think you should push it.
Permalink SaveTheHubble 
July 9th, 2007 9:30pm
Zucchini, don't go into the mental health field, whatever you do.
Permalink AMerrickanGirl 
July 9th, 2007 9:32pm
I'm not considering it at this moment. Hopefully never.
My parents had a problems with loanshark before, changed our life drastically from very rich to quite poor within months, had debt collector waiting in front of our house every night, even trying to cut our home electricity to force my parents to meet them. I have experienced first hand that we can rebound, but at the sametime I wonder whether I could be as strong as them if such situation occurs to me.
Permalink Asian contingent of COTers 
July 9th, 2007 9:36pm
<shrug> I dont agree.  by talking about suicide to your loved ones you are threatening them with something absolutely horrific, and if it drags out with you neither getting better nor actually committing suicide then you are adversely affecting their lives for months, sometimes years, before you actually kill yourself.

why put them through that?  its desperately selfish.

if you are going to kill yourself.  kill yourself.  if not, shut the fuck up.

if you shut up and kill yourself, you only adversely affect their lives from that point on.  if you talk about it for months or years before you actually get up the courage then you are adversely affecting their lives for a hell of a lot longer.

seriously, if you wanna die: go for it.  stop talking about it, stop pissing about.  just kill yourself.


oh, and dont piss about with complicated strategies involving knives or car exhausts or whatever, just find a high cliff and throw yourself off.  its totally fool proof.
Permalink Send private email zestyZucchini 
July 9th, 2007 9:37pm
Oh, well sure, after two or three attempts to talk to those you love, you probably know where you stand.  Talking about Suicide as a threat to manipulate those who care about you is not a nice thing to do either.

It doesn't have to be either/or, of course.  The issue is not "don't talk at all", or "torture them for months".  There's got to be a happy medium -- if such a thing can be "happy".
Permalink SaveTheHubble 
July 9th, 2007 9:40pm
A young woman at my last job killed herself the week after Christmas, with no warning.

People were heartbroken that she never let on that anything was wrong so they could have reached out to her.
Permalink AMerrickanGirl 
July 9th, 2007 9:42pm
they were approaching it wrong.  they should have been happy she finally found a lasting solution to whatever her problem was.
Permalink Send private email zestyZucchini 
July 9th, 2007 9:45pm
i sometimes wish my brother would just die, and leave the rest of in peace. it's not like he hasn't come close. in fact, he's doing a tour of the major organs. heart problems in 2003 (steroids). liver in 2004 (HepC). pneumonia, multiple times. kidneys in 2006 (heroin OD). i tell him he shoudl figure out how to mess up his gall bladder or colon next, as those parts need to readjust with the 75 year old body this 25 year old is carrying.

our mother cant face to look at him. our sister has hair trigger panic attacks herself now. our father wishes he himself would die to stop his own wallowing in hopelessness (he started up smoking again he says less to relieve stress than to hasten his own end).

his pseudo-gf just IM'd me (they met in the psych ward, a match in heaven!). told her to just let him flounder. tomorrow, i think i will tell his boss to fire him (I got him work at the company I contract for, and it's plain without me and the work I put in for him, he'd been gone long ago).

anyway, if there's a manifestation of evil in the world, it's mental illness. not stupidity we afford our politicians, or greedy charlatans of business, or laughably vain celebrities, or even mental retardation (or whatever the PC term is), those're predictable and accommodatable: we like to gossip and make fun at their expense. those are all human, even if a little all-too-human. but the kind of manipulative black hole that extracts every bit of love out of those around them, that always skirts the edge of hope teasingly malicious, as if an agent apart from the person himself, one cannot fathom how this once little boy whose diapers I changed, who i taught hwo to ride a bike, this cannot be the same person, has becoming a festering piece of wetware, with a mind, not of a human kind, of like something else, a spongey vermiform of raw compulsions and repulsions, unmitigated by sentience, or conscience, or soul.
Permalink Send private email strawdog sobriquet 
July 9th, 2007 10:48pm
> I am forced to a dire situation

Interesting external attribution which dissociates yourself from responsibility for your state. That's where I would start.
Permalink son of parnas 
July 10th, 2007 1:36am

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