I went out with him and gave him some food, pet him and soothed him and followed him as he checked out a bit of the front yard.

Then I went inside.

Within 5 minutes, he was crying at the front door to come in. Broke my heart, so I let him back in.

Damn it.

This is the first stray cat I've ever seen in my life who doesn't want to be outside.

You have a regular zoo at your place don't you.

You know how those white folks do.

Today at the library my wife spotted 3 stray kittens living in a wooded area behind a chain link fence at the back of the parking lot.  The woods are surrounded by fences on all sides.  There are 2 or 3 kittens, about 7 or 8 weeks old.  No mom in sight.

Also, when I talked to my wife about taking Irving in, one of the ground rules was that he'd live outside.

Why does he have to live outside?

I wish my girlfriend would let me take in strays.  I'd have a house full of cats by now.

Because we already have 2 cats and a dog in the house.

He was outside to begin with.

Forcing him outside... that's almost as obnoxious as stuffing him in a cage.  Why don't you just bash his head in with a shovel?

Who's forcing him outside?  As soon as he asked to come in, he was let in.  Christ Ward, you could try a little harder instead of just being an OBVIOUS dick.

So, if he tried harder, he could be a concealed dick?  Good idea.