Women who let it go (very NSFW)
On reddit, there was a post on angle shots and then the full shot. Here is a good example. On another note, what do you think of the girl in question.
I am still holding to my claim that the human body is still beautiful (see Leonard Nimoy's pic).
July 14th, 2007 5:15pm
I haven't been to reddit since they sold to Conde Nast. Is this what's there now? Fat girls posting topless photos?
July 14th, 2007 5:22pm
Pretty face and a huge ass. Is the girl on the left the same girl?
July 14th, 2007 5:23pm
OK, found this reddit link apparently the same topic:
"The Art of Cropping"
Yes, this is a big issue with on line personals. You can be severely obese and take a picture at the right angle and lighting and appear to be a serious hottie. Then the guy shows up for the date and it's a serious WTF moment.
July 14th, 2007 5:26pm
Just start asking for full body shots, then. Geez. How hard is it.
They never have any recent ones.
Which is your first clue.
July 14th, 2007 6:04pm
Yeah. If you are going to do online dating, don't waste your time with people who don't want to follow the most basic of protocol.
Hey, looks aren't everything. But if that's what you value, then you have to ask what they look like.
I don't know why people are so shy about their prejudices.
You don't even have to say "No fat chicks". Just say I'm not going on a date if I can't get a picture.
Same way you don't pick black chicks, or tall chicks, or chicks who have low IQ. Express your prejudice. Stop hiding it.
You don't even have to ask for the full body shot.
If the pics they provide are the high-angle ones, you *know* she's fat.
July 14th, 2007 6:57pm
"Express your prejudice."
You have a good point there.
July 14th, 2007 7:50pm
She calls preference prejudice. That's a personal preference of hers. Or is it prejudice?
July 14th, 2007 7:51pm
Are all prejudices necessarily bad things?
Call it a prejudice if you like, but I personally prefer to not associate with some people, such as child molesters.
July 14th, 2007 7:56pm
>Are all prejudices necessarily bad things?
Pretty much by definition, yeah.
>Call it a prejudice if you like, but I personally prefer
>to not associate with some people, such as child molesters.
That's not a prejudice.
July 14th, 2007 7:58pm
Why not? I'm judging them as a class without meeting them as individuals.
July 14th, 2007 8:07pm
Because it's not unreasonable, nor irrational to judge somebody based upon their predilection for child molestation. It is unreasonable to do it on the basis of the color of their skin or their sexual orientation.
July 14th, 2007 8:14pm
Are all prejudices irrational by definition, then?
July 14th, 2007 8:28pm
July 14th, 2007 8:32pm
July 14th, 2007 8:33pm
Speaking of prejudices: People express their prejudice to me openly.
I frighten people when walking around corners. The women, especially white girls, always throw a hissy and scream when I surprise them when we are hugging a blind corner in the hallway. I have seen them do it to each other, and there's no scream. So I guess they think tall brown people are creepy and scary.
Short men stand very far away from me in the elevator. Mexican men have a tall Amazon woman fetish and don't do that. Black men stand as near as they can without being obvious. Gay men who are effeminate and small really show they despise me.
Nobody can say I'm fat, so there's that. They can't express that because I'm just tall and lanky. No jiggles. So it's kinda awkward for people who hate big women. They say they hate big women because big women are fat. But I'm not fat.
If I relax my hair so there isn't any kink, people treat me better. But the black people stop saying hi to me in the elevator because they aren't sure if I speak English.
I have learned to enjoy people's prejudices. If I am in the mood to talk to certain kinds of people, I carry a certain kind of bag and certain kind of book or magazine. Dostoevsky attracts lawyers, Wired attracts younger college people, leather shoes mean business-men sit next to me, running shoes mean I get extra space.
Sitting with my legs open nets me nods from dykes. Exposing cleavage gets me free coffee.
I'm not nearly so observant as to how my appearance alters the behaviour of others. Perhaps I should be.
July 14th, 2007 10:01pm
I know I sound like an obsessive idiot. I didn't observe this because of insecurity: I observe these things because I spent the first 5 years of my career in sales.
Not only that, I grew up sheltered and unaware of how the business world works. I didn't understand how to make managers pay attention to me in meetings. I had to harness their so-called prejudices in order to make my way.
I'm not saying other people don't have these issues: being short, bald, etc., has similar issues to mine.
So... image management is a useful life skill and these girls in the pictures are doing the best with the attributes they have.
July 14th, 2007 10:07pm
Are you sure they aren't reacting to your demeanor, rather than whatever it is you think they're prejudiced about?
July 14th, 2007 10:08pm
No, I wasn't implying you are obsessive or insecure, merely observant. In sales, that self-knowledge would be extremely useful.
It's *extremely* difficult for me to make the transition from getting things to do what I want to getting people to do what I want. It was very recent in my life that I put much thought into it. It wasn't even until late highschool that I realized it might be necessary at all.
I'm not outright socially inept - I'm just nowhere near as good at social interactions as I'd like. Perhaps I'm ok and I'm just judging my people skills against my geek skills. I don't know.
July 14th, 2007 10:10pm
"Are you sure they aren't reacting to your demeanor, rather than whatever it is you think they're prejudiced about?"
That's a valid point that I have thought of already and I take care to review my own actions and attitudes. There's no way to be entirely sure. But my perspective works for me, no doubt about it.
I had a French sales manager )very critical guy, tough to please) who credited me with being incredibly self-aware and told me I had a great deal of knowledge about how I'm being perceived. It makes me a very good public speaker and trainer. I get letters of praise from clients, for example, because I can read them so well that I anticipate their needs without them saying what they are. It requires a lot of effort on my part and it tires me out.
I think cultivating my ability to tell what others are thinking is important. I'm not 100% correct, of course. Sometimes people just don't like me regardless. Sometimes they really do like me but are extremely shy. Sometimes they have just had an argument with their wife/girlfriend and just hate women at that moment.
Mostly people just find me intimidating.
I can be intimidating at times. I am aware that I can project a force of personality. Generally, though, I don't do that if I want to maintain any sort of contact afterward, because many people react negatively to that afterward. So, most of the time I'm more congenial.
Yes, I know I can project a strong congenial personality, too, and I'm working on that. Either way, it take a lot of energy, it wears me out, and since it's ok to be congenial most of the time, it would be pretty exhausting.
July 14th, 2007 10:23pm
Yeah, it is very exhausting.
I do frighten people though. Seriously. I have to be careful. Sometimes I don't watch myself well enough.
I think men who intimidate a bit are viewed as more attractive.
Maybe I should just be scary as hell, then.
Nah. Seriously, 5'9" and 170 lbs just isn't scary right there.
Intimidating, yeah, can be. Scary? Only if you go for the psycho vibe...which isn't exactly the idea.
July 14th, 2007 10:30pm
I have strange taste.
Men who intimidate just a little turn me on.
It is a fine line though.
July 15th, 2007 12:36am
> I do frighten people though.
Perhaps you should put down the kettle ball before talking? A heavy swinging weight is a bit unnerving.
son of parnas
July 15th, 2007 12:42am
Is it cos she is black?
July 15th, 2007 12:51am
i've been told that i can be scary to work with just because I'm not prepared to go around pretending that turds are toffee apples. They even put it on my review to "work on" this as a "people skill".
They can shove it up their collective arse.
July 15th, 2007 5:21am
and the pics are kind of funny, but sad too. the first one, you can see that she has probably lost some weight, but her body is never really gonna recover from where it was at originally. That's tough, especially considering that she is actually pretty.
I once boned this fat chick in drunken desperation. I saw her a couple of times after, just trying to keep it as friends, but she was introducing me to her people as " my man" and stuff, I couldn't handle it. When I stopped seeing her, she phoned me and told me how she was going to weight watchers and stuff. It was sad, and I felt like an arse.
July 15th, 2007 5:25am
"I can be intimidating at times. I am aware that I can project a force of personality."
I have an intense stare and have good peripheral vision that I know gets to people; I guess I got it from video games, sports, programming all of the time.
July 15th, 2007 9:26am
Basically you're all just really creepy people who have been unable to remove the rigor mortis from your face brought on by staring too long at an LCD screen.
July 15th, 2007 9:32am
sure. and you're normal.
July 15th, 2007 10:13am
Nobody reading this is normal.
July 15th, 2007 11:15am
Back to big girls. I actually hung out with some big girls the other day. Hmm, I think with the right clothing, nice hair the big girls do ok. Not hot or anything but attractive. Queen Latifah is kind of pretty. Only thing guys can do is workout, that is about it. Now, would your thing get up for a girl you aren't totally attracted to? Hmm, dont know, hard to say what goes on down there.
July 15th, 2007 11:35am
it can work, if she still has shape. enthusiasm counts for a lot. I would rather be with a chubby chick that wants to be with me than some disinterested egoist beauty. any day.
July 15th, 2007 12:53pm
You could always get a chubby and spend time working out together. Then when she gets svelte, you'll have a trophy.
Of course, that requires work and dedication.