Reconciling assholes for nearly a decade.

So I came back from the toilet and..

Thing 1 and Thing 2 were both sitting on the couch, immediately beside each other and talking about how they were cuddling.

awwww


I sat down for a chat and after a few minutes they popped down and starting playing 'going to the toilet'.

here is where it gets a ltitle unfortunate.  I think its time to stop letting them into the toilet with me....they were doing wees standing up* and explaining that this was because they both had a penis...

I might start shutting the door I think.

* technically they were peeing on the heater at this point....
Permalink pondBacterium 
July 30th, 2007 4:28pm
have you taught them how to go wee in the drier yet? that's always fun. weeeeeee, kinda like a carousel but vertically.

I hear all the NZ kids are doing it.
Permalink worldSmallestManlyMan 
July 30th, 2007 4:32pm
Wait until they understand all the other perks they don't get :D
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
July 30th, 2007 4:33pm
Not gonna go over well, taking their penises away.  Look how angry it's made SoP.
Permalink Send private email Clay Dowling 
July 30th, 2007 4:34pm
Yeeeessss, I've tried explaining the whole "Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina" thing but they just stare blankly and want to know why Daddy gets to "hold his bottom" (direct quote) when *he* goes to the loo.

Sigh. The real problem is, they're far too young to explain the 'gift' women got in exchange...
Permalink Ms. WsV 
July 30th, 2007 4:45pm
Have they *seen* the difference between male and female though? Or does it just not register with them...?
Permalink Send private email bon vivant 
July 30th, 2007 4:51pm
"The real problem is, they're far too young to explain the 'gift' women got in exchange..."

And what would that gift be?
Permalink AMerrickanGirl 
July 30th, 2007 4:52pm
I'm afraid the answer is what I think it is.
Permalink AMerrickanGirl 
July 30th, 2007 4:53pm
nothing worth having.  being able to stand up and pee* _rocks_.


* yes, yes, we all know that technically women _can_ do this, but lets face it...it is _way_ less convenient for women than it is for men.
Permalink pondBacterium 
July 30th, 2007 5:04pm
The gift of the ability to multitask, of course.

Nah. I meant multiple big O's.
Permalink Ms. WsV 
July 30th, 2007 6:05pm
Yes, they've seen, but it isn't registering.
Permalink Ms. WsV 
July 30th, 2007 6:06pm
>>> they were doing wees standing up*

Your wife hasn't domesticated you yet?
Permalink Send private email Ward 
July 30th, 2007 6:17pm
"Your wife hasn't domesticated you yet?"

the first day I pee sitting down* is the last day Ill call myself a man.


* pee by itself that is
Permalink pondBacterium 
July 30th, 2007 6:42pm
I prefer sitting down at night* - don't need to turn on the lights, and don't make a mess.









*yes, I'm a wuss.
Permalink Send private email Ward 
July 30th, 2007 6:48pm
my grandpappy used to sit me down he did, and he would stare me in the face and he would say:

"son, there are 2 types of men; neither of them pee sitting down boy.  so remember to make me proud boy."

so whenever I pee now I think of him*.





* I actually drew his face on a pongpong ball once, improved my aim no end.
Permalink pondBacterium 
July 30th, 2007 7:06pm
In Amsterdam airport they draw little pics of flies on the urinals, and apparently aim is up 30% or something.
Permalink Send private email Colm 
July 30th, 2007 7:07pm
"Nah. I meant multiple big O's."

Nope, that's your reward for the pain of childbirth. Ladies who haven't had the pleasure yet, get out a ruler and measure 10cm.

Or a soup can, the long way.

I was tired and dizzy one night, I peed sitting down, and I was surprised, my shmekle didn't fall off.
Permalink LeftWingPharisee 
July 30th, 2007 9:09pm
... pong pong ball

That's rich.
Permalink probably was 
July 30th, 2007 9:19pm
[[[ Not gonna go over well, taking their penises away.  Look how angry it's made SoP. ]]]
Permalink sidebar nominating bot 
July 30th, 2007 10:55pm

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