Client (software company that uses our product): yeah, software. I do QA work. Always a WTF when you try to tell developers the minimum they need to make the software usable. And speaking of usable, why even bother doing so if you can make fixing it into a consulting opportunity. I mean, no incentive, really. Just lip service to "usability". Nobody cares.
Me: Sigh. Well, consulting is kinda like Paris Hilton's granddad. You know she's gonna get her dad to give her money, anyway. So grandpa is just grandstanding "WHAT? Paris is a WHORE!?? Why, the family name ferchrissakes!" Then he pulls the old "I'm taking your inheritance!" so it is just a PR play. Why bother to actually make it stick when she brings the Hilton's more cachet anyway. No publicity is bad publicity! And anyway, Paris will just do like consultants do: I can't fix the problem without more money, honey!...so anyway, how's that patch/customization I delivered you last week?
Client: Well, "Paris", you're gonna have to do better than a little free custom work as a carrot for bigger stuff...
Chuckle. Funny only to me and him, I guess. Reading it over it makes no sense but okay it did at the time.