How cool would that be? Watching the actual news would be more fun than reading the Onion!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/3554626.stm

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20050823/ap_on_fe_st/turkmenistan_lip_synching_ban

This fellow is perhaps a reincarnation of Norton I, who proclaimed himself Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico in 1859. Quoting:

--
http://www.zpub.com/sf/history/nort.html
http://www.knauer.org/mike/discordia/norton.php

Although a madman, he had all his state proclamations published in San Francisco's newspapers.

When the Vigilantes decide to have a pogrom against the Chinese, and sane men would have tried to stop them, Norton I did nothing but stand in the street, head bowed, praying. The Vigilantes dispersed.

"When the proper man does nothing (wu-wei), his thought is felt ten thousand miles." - Lao Tse

Although a charlatan, Norton I was so beloved that 30,000 people turned out for his funeral in 1880.

"That is in keeping with Mr Niyazov's image as a servant of his people, who lays on every sort of amenity for them."

WTF? Who wrote that article?

Hmm, actually, he doesn't seem anything like Norton I. Perhaps he should consult with historians of Norton's reign, as a lot of what this guy does seems unhealthy. (Though perhaps well-intentioned.)

His Wikipedia page has been vandalized. It'll probably be restored soon, so here goes:

"He has also banned long hair, any penis over 1.4 inches (requiring it to be amputated if discovered,) tatoos of anyone but himself, sleeping between the hours of 2am and 5am, homosexuality, anesthesia in operations, insects, eating on Tuesdays and Fridays, drinking anything other than pig's blood on Thursdays and Fridays, midgets, yeast infections, shaving on the right 40% of the face, the color orange, string, beards, and gold teeth."