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whoops. I had sex with a virgin.

about four months ago. she actually drove me to the drug store to buy condoms on the big day. we've been dating for about a year. she wants to do it all the time. however, every few weeks she flips out and tells me how having sex with me has ruined her life. maybe I'm just bad in bed. I "pressured her into it." (which totally isn't true, but since I'm the dude, of course it is true) She now hates sex. She never wants to have sex with me again. Then a week later she wants to get busy again. it has me really unhinged. obviously I misjudged the situation and shouldn't have gotten involved. but it was going to happen to somebody. is there some damage control I can do here?
Permalink 8888 
January 13th, 2006
try giving her an orgasm.
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
January 13th, 2006
I often give my girlfriend an orgasm. On her face.
Permalink  
January 13th, 2006
Every few weeks? PMS maybe?
Permalink surreal 
January 13th, 2006
Just ask yourself: "What would Jesus do?"
  -tim
Permalink a2800276 
January 13th, 2006
"Whoops?" What did you do? Trip and fall into her vagina?
Permalink Colm O'Connor 
January 13th, 2006
Chocolate. Lots of chocolate (it washes out of sheets). Try to avoid the sort that has gooey centres or - even worse - bits of nut.

But if you have misgivings to the extent of asking others you could do her a favour and move on now rather than later. C'mon now, are you just there for the sex or is there a back story you can develop?
Permalink trollop 
January 13th, 2006
Suicide, its painless.
Permalink Simon Lucy 
January 13th, 2006
...it brings on many changes...
Permalink a cynic writes... 
January 13th, 2006
I have one word for you: February.

Unless you have something bigger planned, you're just wasting your best material on a month that already has a Troll.
Permalink MarkTAW 
January 13th, 2006
whoops. I had sex with a virgin.

The first phrase is missing an "i" and an "e". Looks like there an unwanted "s" as well.
Permalink KayJay 
January 13th, 2006
"Whoops. I had sex with a virgin [cola bottle]."
Permalink Mark Warner 
January 13th, 2006
"...(cola bottle)" I once shared a flat with an ex-copper from Glasgow who had a fund of vile stories from his days on the force. Including taking a witness statement from someone having an externally mounted milk bottle removed;-) Workplace prank apparently...
Permalink a cynic writes... 
January 13th, 2006
>> She never wants to have sex with me again. Then a week later she wants to get busy again. <<

The other boyfriend is out of town that week?
Permalink example 
January 13th, 2006
Uhm the correct word in english is actually "yippee" not "whoops"
Permalink flash91 
January 13th, 2006
If it was in Scotland then it could have been a bottle of sterra (true still in the Midlands as well), which has a narrow neck rather than the somewhat wide neck of a regular milk bottle.
Permalink Simon Lucy 
January 13th, 2006
Given that I was told the story in the first half of 1986 and it would have been a few years prior it would have been one of the old bottle designs.
Permalink a cynic writes... 
January 13th, 2006
Oh My.
Permalink Simon Lucy 
January 13th, 2006
My advice would be to stop dating 16 year olds?
Permalink SomeBody 
January 13th, 2006
8888, was her name "Brandie"? Maybe it's her daughter...

Sounds *exactly* like a girl I dated in the mid-80's. She taught me Philo's Mantra of Abusive Relationships:
"If being in a relationship with someone makes you doubt yourself and constantly think you're at fault or that there's 'something wrong with you', it's an abusive relationship; get out."

She's got issues; your only issue is her. Dump her, feel no regret. Move on. (Check the box that says "Have sex with a virgin"* and never do it again)

Philo

* I don't understand guys' obsession with this one. Why the hell would you actively pursue sex with someone who's inexperienced, going to create an emotional attachment, and is likely young and immature? Stupid.
Permalink Philo 
January 15th, 2006

This topic was orginally posted to the off-topic forum of the
Joel on Software discussion board.

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