Reconciling assholes for nearly a decade.

Must be able to give a good, clean blowjob with a smile

Surely if one is smiling some escapage is likely making the clean part unlikely.
Permalink Simon Lucy 
January 11th, 2006
I think they mean /afterwards/.
Permalink Mark Warner 
January 11th, 2006
So! Mark isn't the only employer to post unreasonable and contradictory job requirements!
Permalink Almost H. Anonymous 
January 11th, 2006
I employ people?
Permalink Mark Warner 
January 11th, 2006
What unfortunately everyone missed other than admin was the zinc plated moron who posted his entire CV, his braincase measurement and the length of his manhood in response.
Permalink Simon Lucy 
January 11th, 2006
I don't get it? Is there something wrong the job posting? Seems reasonable to me.
Permalink ronk! 
January 11th, 2006
Reading this:

'Has an intrinsic desire to be productive and needed by your team'

...made me wince. It's really fucking patronising. I don't want to be stuck in a little box by whoever wrote that.
Permalink Cool Dad 
January 11th, 2006
Hmmm, I think I must be missing something Cool Dad, what about that is condescending?

Really, I'm reading the job posting it sounds appealing to me (but I'm not looking so its moot). What they are looking for sounds a lot like myself. Since I like myself, I don't see the problem. And I can't really tell what kind of place it is (obviously), but nothing about the ad puts me off.

I don't get it.
Permalink ronk! 
January 11th, 2006
>> what about that is condescending?

That's the "with a smile" part.
Permalink MarkTAW 
January 11th, 2006
Here's an extract from it:

"* Has an intrinsic desire to be productive and needed by your team.
* One who enjoys profiling, benchmarking and stress-testing code
* Loves looking for memory leaks and evaluating the overall quality of code. "

Lets be honest, what normal human being fits those criteria?

You know what I have an intrinsic desire for? Having sex. You know what I enjoy? Climbing up hills, cycling, dancing. You know what I love looking for? A nice cigar, bottle of wine, and a good chat with people I respect.

What I find condescending is that to fit the criteria for this job, I can't have desires like a normal human. I have to fit in this little box that the person has created. To put it another way, if I hire someone I don't insist they 'love looking for memory leaks', it's just not right. I have no right to their thoughts. If they do good work, then that's great, but I don't require that they ENJOY profiling, just that they do it when needed. Why should they enjoy it, is doing it not enough?
Permalink Cool Dad 
January 12th, 2006
> Why should they enjoy it, is doing it not enough?

If you want excellence, looks for people who love their job.

I hate working with whining, complaining clock watchers. I love working with people who are enthusiastic and eager about their work.

I'm guessing I'd hate working with you.
Permalink ronk! 
January 12th, 2006
The funny thing is ronk, you are totally wrong. I work hard, and I take pride in my work, delivering, and making a product that people want to use, and by extension, that will sell. I'm in a two person company that's doing damn well and has some major clients. Your characterisation of me as a complaining clock watcher is completely wrong, and odd because I wasn't even aware I was attacking you. With respect, in this case you've been quick to reach a conclusion about someone you know nothing about.

If due to some awful crunch I'm asked to do something complicated when it's the end of a 40hr stint of work with one 15 minute break for lunch yesterday, I don't utter a word. I'm all about making sure people get what they want and what they needed but didn't know they want, because that's what will keep them as a customer of my company.

I expect people to be excellent but I can understand if they have normal wants and needs. I couldn't give a shit what their attitude to profiling was as long as they do it properly. If there are people who like profiling that much, then OK, I'll exploit that, but I'd much prefer a human being. People like that might be great at doing what they want to do but tend not be great at doing what's needed because they are so wrapped up in a technical dream world that they don't address what the customer actually needs.

I don't test because I enjoy it, I test it because it's necessary to test to make sure the code is solid and so the product does what it says it does. Other than that I couldn't give a shit about it. Same with profiling, benchmarking, stress testing etc. They are all means to an end. I guess you would say that excellence is when you concentrate on the task at hand. That is a fair position, even though computing has been my life from the very start, I only see it as a means to an end. It affords me pay X, future pay Y, this will enable me to do Z on date A and so on.

Excuse my rant, I don't like being called a complaining clock watcher!
Permalink Cool Dad 
January 13th, 2006

This topic was orginally posted to the off-topic forum of the
Joel on Software discussion board.

Other topics: January, 2006 Other topics: January, 2006 Recent topics Recent topics