Nobody likes to be called a dummy by a dummy.

Where's Muppet

I just noticed his absense, and it has led me to question everything I believed about continuity. Anybody know?
Permalink  
August 10th, 2005
I don't know about you, but I've got him cleaned out using the greasemonkey script.
Permalink Colm O'Connor 
August 10th, 2005
Oops, I'm the unintentionally mysterious OP.

I don't use the Idiot-B-Gone. And frankly, I don't see how anyone could on ?off. What do you end up with, a whole bunch of blank pages?
Permalink Jeff Barton 
August 10th, 2005
Actually, it's just ?off with the loudest voices removed (just 4 people). It's a more serene version of the same thing, only where calmer voices prevail :)

I might switch it off, but right now I quite like filtering out all the insanity and white noise.
Permalink Colm O'Connor 
August 10th, 2005
Incidentally, someone updated Idiot-B-Gone recently...
http://discuss.joelonsoftware.com/default.asp?joel.3.180466.3
Permalink Tayssir John Gabbour 
August 10th, 2005
I prefer not knowing that they've posted at all, to be honest. Now I don't :)
Permalink Colm O'Connor 
August 10th, 2005
Well, it is kinda entertaining to see an Idiot-B-Gone'd thread where muppet is at the top of his game and his posts are blank. Posters really tend to look like... distraught parents.

Guy1: Muppet, that's just not being reasonable. (blah blah blah...)

Guy2: Oh muppet! Aren't you going a little too far?! (blah blah...)

Guy1: Hah, that is a good observation, Muppet. There's hope for you yet. I had similar thoughts (blah blah blah...)
Permalink Tayssir John Gabbour 
August 10th, 2005
The felt one is perhaps on holiday?
Permalink trollop 
August 10th, 2005
http://discuss.joelonsoftware.com/default.asp?off.9.179833.43

uh...I hope he's ok, actually. It would pretty much suck if he bled out or got sepsis or something.
Permalink Aaron F Stanton 
August 11th, 2005
I have been looking for a reason to learn greasemonkey. Do send me a sample of your script Colm, I'd be delighted to learn a little more about the burning fox.
Permalink Li-fan Chen 
August 11th, 2005
http://damienkatz.net/2005/04/downloads.html
Permalink MarkTAW 
August 11th, 2005
I have a suspicion that muppet has returned to posting as JHC, and the "real" JHC has either gone or never actually existed. The similarity between the styles of the two is striking, and we *know* that at one point muppet *did* post as JHC...
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
LOL

you missed your true calling mat...you really could have been a *great* detective.

<g> Id love to hear your theories on who killed John F Kennedy?
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
August 11th, 2005
I don't really have any theories on who shot JFK, I tend to just go along with the generally accepted "Lee Harvey Oswald acting alone" deal. Sure, it may have been some giant consipracy involving the Russians, the grassy knoll, etc., but then it may also have been aliens or a strange quantum effect that caused a bullet to spontaneously materialise just behind his head and make LHO appear in the window of the book repository with a gun. The simplest explanation, though, is that some loony took a pot shot at him...

(By the way, what *is* a book repository? I've never heard of one apart from in conjunction with JFK's assassination.)
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
A book repository is a building from which to assassinate Presidents. I'd have thought that clear enough from the usage.
Permalink Simon Lucy 
August 11th, 2005
"I tend to just go along"

that matches nicely with your flash of brilliance re me and muppet being the same person.

so you really *are* some kind of retarded turnip?
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
August 11th, 2005
Well if I had access to all the FBI files on Oswald, CIA files on the Russians, and a team of investigators to poke around then perhaps I'd form a different theory, but from the evidence available to me the accepted explanation seems reasonable to me, in the same way that based on the small amount of evidence I have (muppet posted as JHC, muppet has all but disappeared and you've filled his spot, and you both have troll nature) the suppostition that you and muppet are one and the same is not an unreasonable one.
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
"the suppostition that you and muppet are one and the same is not an unreasonable one"

indeed. although, given the fact that I am posting entirely anonymously, and given the fact that I am a relatively intelligent person who could probably manage to disguise my posting techniques, it would *also* be a perfectly reasonable supposition that I could be literally anyone else.

I might even be you :) ..or mat conner, or maybe Im Dana (formerly Blue State Bitch), or maybe Im MarkTaws Darkside.

<shrug> or maybe Im just me.

either way, does it matter in the slightest? you will either agree or disagree with my posts in the same way regardless of whether Im muppet, myself, Dana or our pal Lucy.

...admittedly it would be kind of interesting if I were actually *you*....but thats the only case I can imagine when my 'real' identity would matter in the slightest.
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
August 11th, 2005
I didn't say it was interesting or important or even true, just that I suspected it *might* be true based on circumstantial evidence. Sure, you *could* be any of the others, but you bear more of a similarity to muppet.

I'm thankful, though, that the one person I *know* you aren't is me. :) (At least as far as I can, philosophically speaking, know the the entire universe is not a figment of my imagination or some sort of artificial construct.)
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
"that the one person I *know* you aren't is me"

maybe Im *your* darkside...maybe I post when you think you are asleep.

ever asked your girlfriend how long you spend in bed each night?
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
August 11th, 2005
"maybe I post when you think you are asleep"

And you claimed *I* had a crackpot theory! Unless I suffer from narcolepsy and no-one in the office has seen fit to mention that I keep falling asleep, the fact that you just posted your theory is a pretty good counter-argument in itself.

I'm willing to accept your denial that you're muppet, but I still think my theory wasn't quite as bizarre as you make out. :)
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
"I'm willing to accept your denial that you're muppet"

actually, I dont recall denying that?
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
August 11th, 2005
"actually, I dont recall denying that?"

Not explicitly, no, but you did say:

"that matches nicely with your flash of brilliance re me and muppet being the same person. so you really *are* some kind of retarded turnip?"

Calling me a retarded turnip for having this theory in no way suggests that you're denying it to be true? "Yeah, great theory, retard" seems pretty much like a denial to me, but perhaps where you come from "retarded turnip" is a colloquial expression meaning "insightful"?
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
"Calling me a retarded turnip for having this theory in no way suggests that you're denying it to be true? "

I dont think so. If you read that paragraph carefully you will notice that it is in two clearly separated parts.
Those parts are clearly disjoint.
In the first part, I congratulate you on your great theory:
"that matches nicely with your flash of brilliance re me and muppet being the same person"

in the *second* part I cleverly call you a retarded turnip:
"so you really *are* some kind of retarded turnip?"

I dont see why you would assume those two sentences were related?

""Yeah, great theory, retard" seems pretty much like a denial to me"

clearly it is, but thats also (clearly) not actually what I said.

"but perhaps where you come from "retarded turnip" is a colloquial expression meaning "insightful"?"

actually it *is* a colloquial expression. It means "moronic, bigoted british jackass"
apparently it has its roots in the docks back in the days before the revolution, the british soldiers were clamping down on the locals and talking out against them was likely to result in imprisonment or worse.
Showing an imaginative streak heretofore unseen in the place, the locals began referring to the british soldiers as "retarded turnips" instead of "moronic, bigoted british jackasses"
so on seeing a ship enter the harbour the locals would look at each other in full view of any nearby soldiers and talk about the expected load of retarded turnips.

(retarded turnips was previously a colloquial term for turnips stored in a certain way, with the growth of the stem retarded deilberately to save space)

after the revolution of course life returned to normal and my forefathers resumed referring to the british as "moronic, bigoted british jackasses".
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
August 11th, 2005
OP - he appeared yesterday at the bottom of the thread "Ok, muppet explain this". I suspect he just had a busy day.
Permalink a cynic writes... 
August 11th, 2005
"I suspect he just had a busy day"


actually Im based in new zealand, my time online overlaps with muppets for an hour or two in the morning and again around 10 pm at night.
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
August 11th, 2005
"A book repository is a building from which to assassinate Presidents. I'd have thought that clear enough from the usage."

Sidebar!
Permalink Flasher T 
August 11th, 2005
I realised that JHC - I was ignoring your little ding-dong with Mat and answering the OP.

The point being muppet had put in a brief appearence on the day in question. So, I concluded he'd other things to do - writing his novel, actually working for living, that sort of thing.
Permalink a cynic writes... 
August 11th, 2005
"and answering the OP."

yeah, sorry. I got a little confused.
Permalink Jesus H Christ 
August 11th, 2005
I think there's probably some kind of sidebar rule that one cannot have two consecutive quotes from the same person.
Permalink Simon Lucy 
August 11th, 2005
You know, there apparently was a really good intelligence guy who explained that files about Kennedy's assassination should be leaked slowly, to waste energetic people's time on stupid shit, so many of them are distracted from anything more important and pesky.
Permalink Tayssir John Gabbour 
August 11th, 2005
By "leaked", I mean officially released.
Permalink Tayssir John Gabbour 
August 11th, 2005
"I think there's probably some kind of sidebar rule that one cannot have two consecutive quotes from the same person."

Sidebar! :D
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
Tayssir - I've always felt the same way about Area 51 and shows like the X-Files. People get their fill of conspiracy through that, and don't investigate anything worthwhile.
Permalink MarkTAW 
August 11th, 2005
> indeed. although, given the fact that ...

Writing "indeed" like that doesn't sound like Muppet's style to me.
Permalink Christopher Wells 
August 11th, 2005
Shhh.

Be vewwy, vewwy, qwiet.
Permalink Mongo Fudd 
August 11th, 2005
JHC can't be muppet. muppet doesn't understand logic that well.
Permalink Aaron F Stanton 
August 11th, 2005
I am definitely not Jesus H. Christ.
Permalink Dana (formerly Blue State Bitch) 
August 11th, 2005
I'm Tiger Woods
Permalink qwe 
August 11th, 2005
I'm Spartacus!
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
Yep you're Spartacus (you think I want to get crucified?).
Permalink Simon Lucy 
August 11th, 2005
What film was it that had the "I'm Spartacus" moment, and when Spartacus looked behind him for some sort of support there was a lot of nervous foot shuffling and a cry of "Yes, he's Spartacus"? I'm thinking it was something to do with Mel Brooks, but it's all a bit hazy...
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
History of the World?
Permalink I am Jack's infinite id 
August 11th, 2005
> uh...I hope he's ok, actually.

Me too. I'm really surprised he didn't even pop in to say hi or something last night or this morning.
Permalink Jeff Barton 
August 11th, 2005
That Thing You Do!
Permalink :) 
August 11th, 2005
I am Nomad.
Permalink Nomad 
August 11th, 2005
Could it be that instead of wasting all day annoying his fellow JoS posters, Muppet is engaged in actual work for which he is supposed to get paid?

Fantasy is a wonderful thing.
Permalink Dana (formerly Blue State Bitch) 
August 11th, 2005
Or else he got fired and doesn't have web access at home?

Philo
Permalink Philo 
August 11th, 2005
I'm terribly sorry that I annoy you, Dana. It's a shame to hear, as I've secretly lusted after you owing to your physical proximity. I've been having long chats with Sathyaish via Skype during which I light candles and prance around the room, naked but for natural botanical oils which I smear copiously over my young physique.
Permalink muppet 
August 11th, 2005
Everything okay with you muppet? You sound like your normal self. ;-)
Permalink Jeff Barton 
August 11th, 2005
" JHC can't be muppet. muppet doesn't understand logic that well."

Both hold strange ideas about what is right. JHC is much more dangerous than muppet because while muppet still have a little humility knowing deep inside himself that he could be wrong, JHC once convinced himself he is right would not change his course of action.

:) That's my theory.
Permalink Rick Tang 
August 11th, 2005
Hey, you're back, muppet!

Everything come out all right?
Permalink Aaron F Stanton 
August 11th, 2005
That's a rather unpleasantly apt turn of phrase. Well done. :)
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
It's an incredibly OLD apt and clever turn of phrase that I first heard sometime in 1988.
Permalink muppet 
August 11th, 2005
Hey look! Rick has a theory!

And I have to say something...
Permalink I am Jack's infinite id 
August 11th, 2005
Having never had the acquaintance of someone with an ass-related illness before it's a new one on me, but I can imagine you get pretty tired of it. :)
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
It has nothing to do with ass-related illness. It's a pretty common jibe when out with friends, whenever one returns from the lavatory.

If you're sheltered and it's your first time hearing it, good for you! At the least you'll get to find it funny this one time. :-)
Permalink muppet 
August 11th, 2005
Yeah, for him it's probably *all* SSDD by now.

Literally.
Permalink Aaron F Stanton 
August 11th, 2005
Ba-dum *tish*
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
"whenever one returns from the lavatory"

Hmm. I find that when I'm out with friends we tend not to discuss each-other's toilet activities, but each to their own I suppose... :)
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
How trite, Mat.

Then, I suppose one must go for the low hanging fruit when one's arms are so very short.
Permalink muppet 
August 11th, 2005
In what way was that trite? You've experienced a lot of people saying that they don't tend to discuss their lavatorial habits, and find it to be commonplace?
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
Your tactic of "Oh I would never stoop to such a level as to have a sense of humour but bully for you..." is trite.
Permalink muppet 
August 11th, 2005
No, really, despite stereotypes to the contrary the British sense of humour is not always lavatorial in nature, and I have never heard people making "I hope it came out alright" type jokes outside of Carry On* films, so I'm surprised that any lavatory jokes you've heard were a general thing rather than because of your Crohn's. After your claims that I'm immature it's also odd that you confess to finding poopoo and weewee funny, but perhaps it's because I have no sense of humour... :)

* Look it up.
Permalink Mat Hall 
August 11th, 2005
That lav joke is sort of like one of those things that was funny to say in high school and when people drink in herds they revert to substandard requirements for humor.

You wouldn't just say that to the new secretary as a joke or something.
Permalink I am Jack's infinite id 
August 11th, 2005

This topic was orginally posted to the off-topic forum of the
Joel on Software discussion board.

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