RIP Philo

What kind of money do these wankers make?

The Agile and Scrum and other type of non-sense ring masters and stuff that the corporations hire, do they make good money? What are some numbers?

I am thinking. Fuck it all. Being a developer, no one values you, why not become one of these wankers by day and do personal projects during the meetings.

The job is so easy and there's practically nothing to be done. These wankers just have to get on a conference bridge during sprint calls and say, "Thanks, Y. That was great. Looks like you had a very productive day. Ok, X. Now it's your turn," even when they understand nothing of what X and Y are talking about. It's almost they have headphones on listening to music and stuff while they're on the sprint calls.

So, what kind of moolah do these ass holes make?
Permalink SaaS'er 
April 11th, 2018 2:20pm
1) keep a civil tongue in your head

2) agile team leads / scrum masters do dev work most of their time
Permalink Balbina Gligor 
April 11th, 2018 2:25pm
It doesn't work like that. They make you do pair-programming.
Permalink DrNo 
April 11th, 2018 2:25pm
Good money for someone with zero skills, less than a typical dev.

A good PM/Agile/Scrummaster must also be great at sucking up to his bosses.
Permalink FSK 
April 11th, 2018 2:25pm
> 2) agile team leads / scrum masters do dev work most of their time

Not all the places that I worked at. They were literally people who used to work at the perfume counter at Macy`s before that job. Those types.
Permalink SaaS'er 
April 11th, 2018 2:26pm
mmmm, is she good looking and smelling good?
Permalink DrNo 
April 11th, 2018 2:27pm
I like Macy's perfume counter girls. That is where I like to browse around. I hate going shopping but that is my incentive.
Permalink DrNo 
April 11th, 2018 2:28pm
You can always make an excuse. "I'm buying perfume for my gf."
Permalink DrNo 
April 11th, 2018 2:30pm
So, how do I position myself as a very expensive Agile consultant?
Permalink SaaS'er 
April 11th, 2018 2:37pm
Get some certifications, change your degree to the liberal arts on your resume, and act like someone that managers would "like to share a beer with."
Permalink Jenner 
April 11th, 2018 2:40pm
Certifications is a good idea.

I can't suddenly change my educational qualifications because I've been a long time developer and a pretty good one at that with a lot of good, technical reputation.

I am thinking, like, what type of sentences would these guys use to, say, bait a stupid CTO to hire them to do some Agile stuff for a lot of money?
Permalink SaaS'er 
April 11th, 2018 2:44pm
Anyone who employs you for anything is by definition insane.
Permalink Ubfyedd 
April 11th, 2018 3:13pm
LOL. I agree. He doesn't contribute much beside being a code monkey.
Permalink DrNo 
April 11th, 2018 3:19pm
Maybe if he says  'Yo' a bit more often, they'll give him a chance.
Permalink Algernon Montgomery 
April 11th, 2018 4:06pm
One 'Yo' or 'Yo, Yo, Yo'?
Permalink DrNo 
April 11th, 2018 4:07pm
He is a bit of a yo-yo.
Permalink Ubfyedd 
April 11th, 2018 4:42pm

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