Reconciling assholes for nearly a decade.

I don't blame employers who pass me up

1. because I'm female
2. over 40
3. black
4. LGBT

Who in their right mind wants to deal with all that?

Let's say I have to interface with clients--a certain percentage are going to hate me right off the bat.  You don't have that with a lot of other "groups" you can hire from.

And who knows--my health could fall apart any minute. I could have a complicated female problem, I could fall and break my hip.  I could bring a lawsuit for some real or imaginary slight.

Screw that. Just pass me up.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 3:49pm
This is not healthy, sharkfish.
Permalink Rick Tang 
April 2nd, 2008 3:50pm
Lesbian Gay Bisexual Tranny?

(I know that's not it, but I don't what what 'it' is)
Permalink JoC 
April 2nd, 2008 3:50pm
What bout employers who pass you up because of your skills and attitude? How do you feel about them?
Permalink Colm 
April 2nd, 2008 3:52pm
You are sooooo different?

I am sure there are trannies from Singapore, non-english speaking that need works Visas and employers still hire them.
Permalink Bot 
April 2nd, 2008 3:53pm
Sharkfish has clearly fallen and hit her head.  Because the old sharkfish would have kick those crackers' collective asses and taken names.
Permalink Send private email Clay Dowling 
April 2nd, 2008 3:55pm
They don't know me well enough to pass me up because of my attitude.

Skills? Yeah, well, who knows.

I'm generally a decent employee.  But that is mostly because I'm trustworthy, non-litigious, fun to be around, dynamic, and interesting.  I bring a lot to the table besides worker-bee skillsets.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 4:03pm
It could be that because I'm surrounded by a lot of city workers--union people who allow their health to fall apart, take frequent smoke breaks, and run out of the building at 3:30PM--I have changed my view.

If I saw those hoards, I wouldn't hire them, either.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 4:05pm
>They don't know me well enough to pass me up because of my
>attitude.

Well, their first impression of your attitude then

>Skills? Yeah, well, who knows.

You. No body else would. Have you asked him?
Permalink Colm 
April 2nd, 2008 4:07pm
I am great with first impressions.

That's why I was in direct sales for many years.

I'm great speaking to groups. 

Not sure why this is an issue.  I am what I am.  All that I do in an interview to overcome these issues gets harder and harder to do with time.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 4:16pm
How do they know you're over 40 or LGBT unless you tell them?

Look, most interviews you go on, you won't get the job.  That's probably because someone else with slightly more appealing qualifications beats you to the top of the heap.

Why immediately blame it on your gender, race or sexual orientation?  It may have nothing to do with that.
Permalink Treppenwitz 
April 2nd, 2008 4:52pm
In fact, it could be your interpersonal skills that lose you the job.

The impression I get is that you're blunt, no nonsense and don't kiss up.  That might come across the wrong way in an interview.
Permalink Treppenwitz 
April 2nd, 2008 4:53pm
Because sharkfish spends every minute of every day feeling threatened, and the idea of admitting any weakness that might conceivably be her own fault TERRIFIES her.
Permalink Send private email muppet 
April 2nd, 2008 4:53pm
Blaming this on your ethnicity or gender is a cop out, IMO.
Permalink Treppenwitz 
April 2nd, 2008 4:55pm
SHARKY IS A TRANNY! HOLY SHIT!
Permalink hideAWang 
April 2nd, 2008 5:00pm
Nah.  People love me.  It can't be my brilliance. Must be my looks and personality. ;p
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 5:05pm
You guys forget that us assimilated black folks are taught to be completely phony in the business world.

We have two faces.  There's the face on this board, the face in my personal life, and the face I present to the work world.

They are all three very much a part of who I am. 

Not sure why anyone here thinks it not possible for me to be a complete ass on this board and yet a softie in real life.

At my current job, I don't take shit at all.  But that's only a recent development.

That's why they love me.  This is the only job I have ever regularly told people to fuck off and die. And this is also the only job where they gave me a surprise birthday party with cake.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 5:20pm
"SHARKY IS A TRANNY! HOLY SHIT!"

I do have my fantasies.  But. No.

http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/41/superpiipii.html
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 5:21pm
As I said, this is not healthy.
Permalink Rick Tang 
April 2nd, 2008 5:28pm
"We have two faces.  "

Should be we have several faces.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 5:31pm
"Because sharkfish spends every minute of every day feeling threatened, and the idea of admitting any weakness that might conceivably be her own fault TERRIFIES her."

Yea, but most said on this forum is BS anyway.  I hope sharkfish is just joking in her post.  Nobody gives a crap if you are lesbian (how would they find out).  Nobody cares if you are a certain race.  Unless you are doing work for the KKK website, they probably won't care.  Even if you were doing work for the KKK website, they still wouldn't care assuming you are working on-site.

People in a company want one thing.  Do work, so the company or "me" makes money.  If they perceive that you won't make money, like you come in drunk or stoned.  Then you probably won't get the nod.

I don't know about engineering sales.  But the highly technical work, they don't give a cr*p.  If you don't know your stuff.  Then they do give a crap.

I have normally done pretty well in interviews.  Even though, I normally don't get dressed up. I am normally half asleep. I am always late.  Yet, I know that probably doesn't matter because I know I can out geek them. I might start talking about functional programming and test driven  development.  "Oh, so Ruby's rspec is a good behavior driven development library and is replacing unit testing because it is easier to blahaaaaaaaa, blahaaaaaaah".  For technical jobs, they don't care if you smell or didn't wear a suit. I don't even have a suit.  And my ties I use them for bandannas.

I did have a horrible technical interview which really showed I didn't know a lot about programming (this was a while back).

I got grilled to hell and back.  This guy basically asked me to understand the java language specification by heart and basically everything about the inner-workings of the java virtual machine and describe all of this over the phone.

"Dude, I just don't know.".  At one point, I sat there for 10 minutes and there was complete dead air.

After about a hour and a half of interview; he says, "Thanks we will get back to you"  and I sitting there just drenched in sweat.

In this situation, I didn't get the job...because ***GASP***  I didn't know my stuff at the level that I needed to for the position.
Permalink Bot 
April 2nd, 2008 6:21pm
I'm not complaining about not getting a job here, people.

I don't worry about it, to be honest.

I don't even want a job. I just want to have fun.

I could die tomorrow.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 2nd, 2008 7:06pm
Is that super pii pii thing for real?  Now _that's_ worth getting a Wii for!
Permalink Send private email Ward 
April 2nd, 2008 7:47pm
Pii pii?  Surely you mean "piss piss".
Permalink Treppenwitz 
April 2nd, 2008 9:40pm
sharky, have you ever tried selling some of those as features?  "As a black woman the market undervalues my skills, which means you can fill this position for far less than what a white man would cost."
Permalink Michael B 
April 3rd, 2008 12:05am
when was yr last interview?

who passed u up?
Permalink Send private email Luis Release 
April 3rd, 2008 1:27am
>(I know that's not it, but I don't what what 'it' is)

Acutally that is it, I just looked it up.
Permalink Send private email a2800276 
April 3rd, 2008 5:10am
I haven't interviewed since 2005.  Back then I accidentally got into a SQL job interview (look writing that stuff isn't my bag and I don't care enough about it to do complicated queries without Googling first so that interview didn't go well), and I interviewed for the job I have now.

Nerds don't hire me.  It's a fact. But that didn't prompt this post.

I was just thinking out loud.  It isn't about rejection.  It is just about how if i were on the market, I wouldn't hire me if I were a white man with stuff to lose.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 3rd, 2008 9:07am
Are you saying that this is likely to be your last job and that if you loose your current job, you will be unemployed until you check in with the big guy?
Permalink cookies 
April 3rd, 2008 9:27am
There should be a rule against starting a post with "There's no answer (to my problem - or even admitting it's a problem )" and ending a post with "There's still no answer, nor was solving it the purpose of posting here."  hehe.
Permalink LORB 
April 3rd, 2008 9:53am
"Are you saying that this is likely to be your last job and that if you loose your current job, you will be unemployed until you check in with the big guy?"

I am preparing myself for that fact that I have years and years of knowledge and tools in my head that are useful, but the people I have to communicate this stuff to are more and more affluent and distant from my reality.

The disconnect is apparent with the properties I posted in the original post in this thread.  My values and "their" values are vastly different.
Permalink Send private email sharkfish 
April 3rd, 2008 10:45am
So at some point, you will start a co. then?  Or change careers?  Usually, the answer lies in combining things in some way.
Permalink LORB 
April 3rd, 2008 12:36pm
I've said it before, but go into defense work.  There's a large presence in Chicago and Cali (where you can move once you're rid of the SO).

They LOVE all those things, and you'll only get more valuable as you get older.

This is all assuming you've stopped the coke use for the last 10 years or so.
Permalink Crisis of Salad 
April 4th, 2008 12:52am

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